To Hell and Back

As first time parents, Aaron and I are learning as we go.  Poor Penelope has to put up with inexperienced parents.  We are taking things one day at a time and learning new things each day.  

During the night Penelope wakes up every 2-3 hours to have her diaper changed but mostly to be fed.  Oh how I miss those 10 hour sleeps I loved so much.  Since her birth we have had a total of 3 sleepless nights.  These nights include non-stop crying and a baby that just wont settle down.  However the first 2 nights were nothing compared to last night.  And by last night I mean all of yesterday and all of the night.  Penelope hit her 2-3 week growth spurt that the midwives warned us about.  This was the growth spurt from hell.  And I am in no way exaggerating.  She literally wanted to eat non-stop all day.  She would finish eating and as I would burp her she would be viciously rooting around for more food.  This wasn't the cute "Oh look she is looking for a nipple."  She was throwing her head into my shoulders hoping to find a nipple up there.  Screaming when she realized there wasn't anything up there she wanted.  She was grabbing at my tank top and at one point got ahold of my hair and wouldn't let go.  Aaron had to save me from her death grip.  Violent and vicious Penelope.  I sat in the exact same spot on the couch for more than 5 hours and then who knows how many hours in the rocker because Penelope wouldn't stop eating and screaming.  Eating and screaming.  It wasn't only mentally draining but physically as well.  It literally felt like shards of glass were racing through my nipples.  And there was no break, none at all.     

Today we re-watched "The Happiest Baby on the Block" DVD we received from my Aunt a few months back.  Aaron has been practicing the "5 S's" and we are now enjoying a little quite time.  She is finally asleep and we are slowing restoring our sanity.

Getting Caught Up

I have been really slacking on posting updates. I thought Id be able to keep up but it turns out its not easy typing with a baby attached to you. Even when she is napping and I think I have a minute to get some things done I realize that I need to nap as well, because lets face it those 3 hours per night just aren't enough.

So lets see...Penelope is 2 weeks yesterday! I cant believe its been that long, I feel like we literally just brought her home. On Monday July 16th, we had our 3-day home visit with Rene, a nurse and lactation consultant. She is a wealth of knowledge. To anyone who is planning on breastfeeding you MUST meet with a lactation consultant, maybe more than once. They say breastfeeding isn't supposed to hurt, but I have yet to find anyone who hasn't experienced some pain. The baby has to be at the exact perfect angle with the perfect latch, which is hard to know when your a first time mom. Anyways things were pretty painful there for a few days. But Rene helped bring peace to my breasts. At the home visit Penelope was checked out and while she was healthy she had lost quite a bit of weight, 10% of her birth weight to be exact (they prefer no more than a 7% loss). My giant 9lb 1oz baby was now 8lbs 3oz, still giant but not as giant. We concluded it was due to my milk not being established yet, this happened at day 4. 

Also, Rene noticed that Penelope had a possible minor posterior frenulum, more commonly known as the tongue tie. That's medical language for the piece of skin under her tongue was thicker than normal, causing her not to be able to stick her tongue out completely. As it turns out its a hereditary condition coming from Aaron's side of the family.  She suggested we meet with a ear, nose and throat specialist. Of course, me being the momma bear I am now, began freaking out immediately. What do you mean something is wrong with my baby? Like with most things Aaron took a very relaxed, 'everything will be just fine' stance.  Our appointment with Dr. Connelly, the ear, nose and throat doctor, was 2 days later and Rene, the nurse, was right. We opted to have her posterior frenulum taken care of with a small in-office procedure.  The procedure literally took 1 minute and I was hysterically crying by the end of that minute.  Poor Penelope has an emotional mom sure to embarrass with her tears for the rest of her life.  The following day we went to the birth center for a weight check. Rene wanted to make sure breastfeeding was going better and that Penelope's tongue was taken care of.  Penelope had gained 4.5 ounces in 3 days! Since her tongue had not healed yet, I attribute her weight gain to my milk coming in and getting a better latch with breastfeeding.

We had our 2-week postpartum visit on Friday July 27th.  Both Penelope and I came away with a clean bill of health.  Penelope now weighs 8lbs 13oz, still not at her birth weight but making good progress.

Penelope's Birth Story

Throughout our labor Aaron and I took notes so as to not forget this incredible experience. Remembering the birth of our daughter is very important to us, even the not so fun parts. I want to share our natural birth experience with those interested in reading about it because I honestly feel more women should know they have choices when it comes to delivering their children. Living in the United States women tend to believe they are bound to a hospital setting with an abundance of drugs and doctors, and this just isn’t the case.

On Thursday July 12, 2012 I woke up at 3:20am to contractions. Before really experiencing them I was worried I wouldn’t know what they felt like and that I wouldn’t know labor had started. I was wrong, I knew right away what they were. I laid in bed for an hour before nudging Aaron to tell him I thought this was it. At this point I was cautious about getting too excited since I knew that many women experience false labor for hours only for the contractions to stop completely. Of course Aaron, with his amazing sleeping abilities, fell right back asleep until 5:00am when he woke from hearing me deep breathing through the contractions. We laid in bed for an hour before Aaron decided he better go to the grocery store to get us food and other essentials we would be needing for labor. Our midwives stressed the importance of eating during early labor as well as having a large meal after delivery since the whole process can be compared to running a marathon.  Yes I said marathon, and yes that is 26 miles.  The birth center was equipped with a full kitchen for our use.  When Aaron returned from the store an hour later (he gets a little lost in grocery stores without me) he made me French toast and we tried to pass time by watching Fresh Prince of Bel Air reruns.  At this time I was having pretty strong contractions but I was still able to talk through them (kind of), a sign that I was still in early labor. I called my parents to let them know I thought I might be in early labor, still not wanting to jinx anything.  At 9:30am Aaron and I drove the dogs to the park and went on a forty-five minute walk.  Walking is supposed to make labor proceed at a quicker pace.  As I experienced contractions we would stop walking, I would rock my hips back and forth while Aaron coached me on deep breathing. At this point contractions were coming roughly every five minutes.  When we returned home I got in the shower and worked through the contractions while Aaron got some things around the apartment taken care of.  At noon we decided we better start timing the contractions to get a better gauge on how things were progressing.  While doing this we watched American Pie Reunion.  Every time I felt a contraction come on I would pace around the living and dining room trying to only concentrate on my breathing.  The pain was becoming more intense.  After an hour, Aaron averaged out my contractions, which ended up being 3 minutes apart.  At 2:40pm Aaron called the birth center and spoke with the midwife on-call, Roswitha, who suggested we wait it out a little while longer at home.  I was a little discouraged because the contractions were getting closer and closer but I was also glad to do as much of my labor as possible at home.  I tried lying in bed, thinking it might relax me more but it did the exact opposite. It seemed to make the pain a million times worse. So I was stuck pacing around the apartment for hours.  The hard part hadn’t even begun yet and I was already beginning to feel tired.  

Around 6:30pm we got to the birth center after talking to Roswitha again who was certain things had sufficiently progressed.  Upon arrival Roswitha asked which room I preferred, and of course, I requested Barcelona the largest of the 3 birthing suites.  She quickly got the room ready for me and then confirmed that I was 5 cm dilated and 100% effaced.  I was hoping I would have been a little bit more dilated but I was glad to know I was definitely in labor.  There was no turning back now.  I spent a good portion of time sitting on one of those exercise balls, rocking my hips as the contractions came and went. 

Doula Aaron was prepared to use counter pressure on my back for the entire labor yet when it came down to it I preferred not to be touched.  When things got more intense I got in the birthing tub, the glorious birthing tub.  Between the warm water and the buoyancy I felt so much better.  With Doula Aaron’s coaching I was able to maintain my deep breathing and let my body be as loose as possible. 

At 9:25pm I felt and heard a popping sound, my water had broken.  Roswitha confirmed it and informed me that the pressure was going to get really intense now.  The bag of water is what was cushioning Penelope’s head from my pelvis bones.  Without that bag of water it was bone pushing on bone.  I could feel a difference immediately. I was now in the “Transition Stage,” the stage when dilation progresses from 7 cm to 10 cm, complete dilation.  During our birthing class we learned that the uterus exerts over 60 pounds of force per square inch during labor.  This was the point at which I felt that immense power.  I was in the birthing tub the entire “Transition Stage” so I don’t know how it would have felt outside of the tub but it wouldn’t have been pretty.  After only 35 minutes I felt the urge to push.  Before doing so I let Roswitha know, she then confirmed that I was completely dilated and gave me the okay to push.  Pushing too early can cause swelling of the cervix, therefore delaying the labor process until the swelling subsides.  It was then that Kat and Megan, the two birth assistants came to Roswitha’s aid.  It takes a team to birth a baby.  So I pushed and I pushed. And pushed some more.  I wasn’t making much progress and Roswitha could tell I was holding out on pushing as hard as I could.  The truth is I honestly felt like I was going to have a bowel movement in the tub.  I wasn’t necessarily scared of pooping in front of Roswitha or the two birth assistants but I just really didn’t want to get out of that tub.  After an hour and a half of being in there I had found comfort and was scared of how things would feel outside of the beloved birthing tub.  But alas Roswitha could tell things weren’t progressing as they should so she recommended I get out and try the birthing stool.  What an awkward contraption that turned out to be. 

(I found this picture on the internet to show you what the stool looked like)

I was instructed to sit on it and lean back on Aaron while he was sitting on the bed.  I probably didn’t position myself correctly because it hurt my back immensely.  After a few pushes I asked to try something else.  It was then that we got on the bed and switched back and forth from the typical lying with my back propped up with pillows to the left and right sides.  It felt like an eternity of pushing. One of the best “props” the midwife brought out was a long rope with handles on either end.  I was to pull as hard as I could while the birth assistant, Kat, pulled the other end as hard as she could.  It really helped the extent of the push.  I reached down and felt little Penelope’s fuzzy head.  Nothing gave me more motivation than when Doula Aaron, with a giant grin on his face said, “I can see her head, and it’s so hairy!”  After 3 ½ hours of pushing (that had to have been some sort of record) Penelope Juanita was born and placed immediately on my chest at 1:43am on Friday July 13, 2012.  It was the greatest moment of my life, not only did we finally get to meet our giant Penelope but our 22 hour labor had finally come to an end.  She immediately melted our hearts as she was greeted with cheers and lots of happy tears.  

As Roswitha quickly checked out our new baby she noticed a good amount of vernix, a white substance that babies are covered in until full gestation.  Because of this she predicted that Penelope was not 41 weeks like we had originally thought but only 39 weeks.  

Our predictions were correct our giant Penelope really was giant. At birth she weighed 9 pounds 1 ounce, and was 20 1/2 inches in length.  Thats one giant Penelope!  

She's Arrived!

Guess what everyone?

I am no longer forever pregnant. It seemed like it would never happen but alas it finally did! I gave birth to Penelope Juanita on July 13th, 2012 at 1:43am. Yes, it was Friday the 13th! She was born on the same day as my Grandmother Juanita Sanders in 1928, whom we named Penelope after. Its odd how amazingly things like that work out, isn't it?

We are loving our new lives together!

July 13th, 2012

July 14th, 2012

July 15th, 2012

46 Years Pregnant

While I feel I may be pregnant forever I saw an episode on the Discovery Channel about a woman who was pregnant for 46 years. And if its on the Discovery Channel it must be real, right? 

The woman was from a small tribe in Morocco who became pregnant in 1955. She refused to have a Cesarean and had labor pains for a few days before they completely subsided. She figured her baby went to sleep. She then decided not to taken any action until her baby "woke up." Of course, she never had any more children but adopted 3 and raised them like her own. 

...46 years later...

The now 75 year old woman starts complaining about abdominal pain and after multiple doctor visits finally finds out she has a mass inside of her. It was her baby that "went to sleep," a full term baby which attached to her organs and died becoming entombed inside of her for 46 years.

Here is a picture of the mass they removed from her:

Over Due

Today I am officially 3 days over my due date, although this doesn't mean anything. Most first time moms are pregnant for up to 2 weeks after their 40 week due date. I hope this wont be so in my case but this is something I don't have control over. I try to act very patient but I am not, not at all. I want this baby out! I want to hold her, kiss her, squeeze her and never let her go. She probably senses this and wants to steer clear of all the embarrassing love her Dad and I will put upon her. 

The midwives at the Birthing Center have given me tips to get the cervix softened and to hopefully dilate, here they are:

1. Red Raspberry Leaf Tea- This was the hardest thing to find! We drove all over looking for it, even went to a natural food store and finally ended up at Central Market. The one store in all of Austin that carries it (I'm sure Whole Foods does as well). I drink tea every morning yet I was a little apprehensive to try this one because I hate fruit flavored tea. Before getting pregnant I drank Black English tea and then switched to Pregnancy tea. But the Red Raspberry Leaf tea doesn't taste like raspberries at all, thank god!
2. Exercise Ball- Apparently rocking your hips back and forth and also doing figure-eights is supposed to guide the baby's head down into the pelvis. So on my exercise ball I sit and wiggle.
3. Sex- Yup, that's right sex. Giant 40 week uncomfortable sex. While it doesn't induce labor (unfortunately) it produces a prostaglandin release which can help soften the cervix and prepare for dilation.
4. Walking- I have stayed very active my entire pregnancy, only stopping for 2 weeks when sciatica was kicking my ass. Aaron and I walk the dogs every morning for about 2 miles. I am usually waddling along behind Aaron, but not anymore. He said he has never seen me move so fast. I want Penelope out, dammit! Trying to work up a sweat and get that heart rate up. Tomorrow I plan on walking laps around Aaron, lets hope the dogs and him can keep up. I wait for no one. 
5. Pineapple- Eating a lot of pineapple to induce labor is an old wives tale, but it couldn't hurt right? Yesterday I ate an entire pineapple in less than 30 minutes while bouncing on my exercise ball. It was a miracle I kept it down. Too much pineapple and too much bouncing made this pregger nauseous.

37 Weeks 1 Day Photoshoot

I was lucky enough to have 666 Photography do a fun set of maternity photos for me. I had been getting the other 'normal' maternity photos done because I knew I wanted something a little different at the end of my pregnancy. I am so glad I was able to get two very different kinds of professional photos throughout my pregnancy to showcase my ever-growing belly.

I had such a great experience at this shoot! But let me tell you it is weird not to suck in your stomach while having your picture taken, I'm sure you all know what I am talking about.

Dear Health Care

Like a lot of Americans I was without health insurance for years (and for 9 months of my pregnancy). I never had any health emergencies thankfully, however the "what ifs" were always in the back of my mind.

The day I found out I was pregnant I applied for Medicaid Perinatal, to cover all of my prenatal appointments as well as labor and delivery costs. Much to my surprise I was denied. Apparently my income was too high, yes that's right a part-time server (and student) made too much money for government assistance. I then applied for CHIP Perinatal, basically the same thing as Medicaid just for people with higher incomes. Denied...once again. Apparently I made too little to qualify for CHIP and was told to apply for Medicaid. I was stuck in an evil health care black hole. It was around this time that Aaron and I made the decision to go the natural birthing route and since Medicaid/CHIP doesn't cover this type of birthing I gave up the hope of receiving assistance. We continued on as "Self-Pay" patients of the Austin Area Birthing Center with a new $4,000 bill to be paid in monthly installments due before my 37th week. While this was a shit ton of money to us, it is just a fraction of the cost of a OB/GYN and hospital labor/delivery. But we didn't choose to go the natural route because of financial reasons, I would have fought those damn Medicaid people everyday if I felt it was a better way to bring Penelope into the world.

Fast forward to present at 40 weeks pregnant. I once again applied for CHIP Perinatal for the sole reason that once covered Penelope would be covered upon birth. I don't care if I never go to the doctor but she needs too. Apparently now I qualify for assistance and have been covered by Regence-Blue Shield. I am so glad that I was finally accepted, however, why now? Why not when I might have actually used it? I could have possibly found a OB/GYN who would let me birth naturally...maybe. There are tons of people who abuse all aspects of governmental assistance yet someone who is trying to better themselves through college education and supporting herself doesn't qualify? As you can tell I am still bitter even though I would not change our Birthing Center decision for anything.

Aaron is also insurance-less. And while his school will be offering health insurance in the fall semester he is out of luck for the next 7 weeks. He has needed multiple root canals for as long as we have been together, and of course the pain from one of them has now become too unbearable so we must foot the bill for a $2,000 root canal/crown. And while the Dentist we were referred to by his University is an Alum of the same University he doesn't offer student discounts or any sort of payment plan. Perfect. How awesome.

I am so sick of the lack of health care and general care in the health field. Why is it so damn hard? Why aren't people who need help being helped? And how are those abusing the system getting through the cracks? Don't people become doctors/dentists to help people? I am not sure if we are being helped or getting screwed, although I know what we are leaning towards and it isn't pretty.

I read this article today- "Russell Dohner, Illinois Doctor, Charges Patients $5 For Entire Physician Visit". There needs to be more people like this in this country.

Morning Giggles

I had my 40 week appointment today at the Birthing Center! I never thought this day would get here, it seemed so far away. The midwife said that things are progressing naturally very well and she thinks Ill have this baby within a week. Wahoo! Come on Penelope!

I still walk the dogs every morning with Aaron and every morning my shadow cracks me up. So here are pictures of my shadow from the front and one from the side. I hope you all think its as ridiculous as I do.

2 more days...

I cannot believe we only have 2 days left until our due date. The time has finally arrived. It feels like just yesterday I peed on a stick then slowly began to freak out while Aaron fell back asleep like nothing. Leaving me wide awake to deal with my roller coaster emotions of extreme excitement and anxiety. I feel like I have been pregnant forever yet at the same time I still cant believe I am actually pregnant and will be giving birth at any moment. Is it possible this is all a dream? Somehow looking down at my ridiculously large belly tells me this is 100% real. 

When I look back at our pregnancy, I cant help but smile. We have had a wonderful experience. Everything has come so naturally and fallen into place beautifully. Before getting pregnant I couldn't have imagined the bond Aaron and I share would possibly get any stronger yet it completely has. Aaron has superceded all of my expectations of what an expectant Dad should be. Everyday I feel more and more lucky that we found each other.

Errands

Like most of our days off, today was spent running errands. Trying to get as many things accomplished as we possibly can. Our list is slowly but surely getting smaller and smaller, yet of course other things keep getting added. 

As we were out and about I started having some very painful contractions. Luckily they all happened in the car so I was already sitting and relaxing through them was easy, well as easy as that can be. However, while this string of contractions went on I was secretly giving Aaron directions to Baskin Robbins. He didn't know where I was taking him but he knew it was important because I was able to open my eyes and navigate our way through the deep breathing techniques we had learned using the Bradley Method. As soon as he saw the 31 Flavors sign he knew where I had been directing him and burst out laughing.

Contractions or not, sometimes a girl needs her Peanut Butter 'n Chocolate ice cream!